Thankful Thursdays ~

On this Thankful Thursday, I am thankful and grateful that God is opening doors for me work with tween and teen girls. I have to be honest I adore them!  I love their passion and zest for life. And it is fun to see how much they love my shoes.

So I wanted to share one of my latest weekly blogs called, Teens Talk Tuesdays.

In my efforts to empower, equip and coach young women through my Pure Empowerment Purity, Passion and Purpose, Seminars, Workshops and Weekly Classes; I have added this new post to reach tweens and teens that speaks to the issues that both girls and boys face.  My desire is that this weekly blog will prompt and promote dialogue between tweens, teens and their parents.

I often find as a MOM one of the best places to have great conversations with The SONs and your tweens and teens is the car. Yes, the car.

They seem to open up and share more readily especially if it is a sensitive subject such as sex, dating or what in the world am I going to do with my life.  Well, the bottom line is kids tend to feel comfortable and chat much more in the car rather than in living room or in their father’s office where they feel they we are more in the interrogative mode…  The SONs and I have had many a great conversation about sex, life and stress in my old suburban.  This Teens Talk Tuesdays was prompted by just that kind of conversation the youngest SON  and I had in my car just the other day.  I pray it bless you as much as it did he an I.

Teens Talk Tuesdays…

So yesterday the youngest SON and I got into a discussion and were talking about STRESS.  The SONS had all made a comment earlier in the week which was, “We don’t like it when you say we don’t have stress because we do have stress in our lives.”  Now the SONs are 10, 13, 15 years old.

I recall saying, “Yes, you are right.  You do have stress and I am sorry we have ever said that you don’t.”  I went on to say something like this, adults have stress and teens have stress, it is just that adult stress is different from teen stress. But it is still stress and it doesn’t mean that your stress is any less stressful than our stress. Then I ask him, “Does that sound right?”

He gave me a confused look and said, can you say that once again?  I said well, I am not sure but I will try.  So I said it again and rephrased it some.

He said, Mom, let me rephrase that a bit.  He tried too and then said, “Mom, just go with you said.  It may be a bit confusing but it is right on target.”  He then said, “Kids have stress.  We deal with school, dating, bullying, handling advanced classes, making good grades and well, we have lots of  stuff. Mom, we stress out too.”  Who would have  necessarily thought a ten-year old would have so much stuff he was stressed too.

It is funny isn’t that we sometimes forget that we all have stress no matter our age.  But it is easy to be a bit unclear on stress. our stress, our kids’ stress, our families’ stress, the world’s stress and the stress we all feel coming at us each and every single day.  And sometimes teens and parents can’t agree on whose life is harder and more stressful.  I often say to the SONS, “this is not a competition on who had the harder day and who has the most stress.”  Once again we must remember that parents and teens alike all have stress – it is just a different stress.
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As our youngest said, I may be 10 but I have stress.  Yes, as parents it can be easy, unfortunately, to dismiss and even ignore the stressors in our tween and teens’ lives.  They have much facing them these days, relentless bullying, careers to think about, grades to keep up, divorced parents, purity choices and the list goes on and on.  Worst yet is that often teens think we as parents don’t understand.  I pray that as parents we are all trying to understand.  I also pray we are seeking God to help us raise these precious gifts in our lives.

As adults we have mortgages, car payments, insurance, household bills, food to put on the table,  and on top of that the average cost to raise a child is $241,080. until the age of 18 years old  and this does not even included college.  Ok, that is some crazy stressful stuff for parents to wrap their heads around in an economy that is uncertain.  The great news is that we operate in God’s economy and our trust is in Him for provision and to use our talents and gifting to make a living for our families.

It could be easy to say to our teens that our stress is worse than yours when you read the above paragraph.  But maybe it would just be wise if we simply acknowledged their stress and ours is simply different.  Maybe if we said, “How can I help you manage your stress and here is how you can help me manage mine.”  A family is about helping each other be the best we can be.  Winters and I are working hard to raise responsible young men, but the operative word is working.  Great families don’t just happen, you have to work at them. We have  an opportunity to grow as a family and teach our tweens and teens about healthy ways of handling stress.

And to any tween and teens reading this, please tell us when you feel stressed out.  Please forgive us if we seem insensitive to the stress in your life.  Please help us help you, by asking us for help.  We are, believe it or not, on your side.  We want to help you deal with the stressors in your life.  Please remember we are all human and as parents we will make mistakes. That is why we are so grateful for grace.  We hope you will understand our stress too.

The truth is we all have stress.

I must remember my crazy quote, “Adults have stress and teens have stress. It is just that adults’ stress is different from tween and teens stress; but it is still stress and it doesn’t mean that your stress is any less stressful than our stress.”

May we always remember to savor the moment for life is short, even on Planet Puberty but it is indeed a wonderful planet! And to our tweens and teens please be patient with us and remember we love you.

So on the Thankful Thursday, I hope if you have teens, friends, or other moms you know that this blog may bless please feel free to share it with them or pass on the link.

Be blessed and encouraged abundantly my fellow leaders as we live life in our passion, purpose and parenting!